well i am not too sure the depths of my feelings towards coming home tomorrow so i thought i should write a little to let you and me both know. well there is the surfacy excitement first of all. for example. my parents house. they have been working on this garage and swimming pool since the day i left, and now they are both done, so i am pretty excited to swim in the pool even if its cold.
also i am excited to be off of work for a week. i am excited to drive a car. excited to eat mexican food. excited to do laundry in some what normal conditions. i am excited to get home and wrap my own gifts since i have finished all the new yorkers at this point. i am excited about warm air.
but at the same time, i am a little worried. because although i am excited to see people initially, i am a little worried about how i am going to feel when i have to leave them. my dear friend erica came up to nyc last week, and it was wonderful. we had THE BESt time. so fun. but when it was time to part, i couldn't take it. i cried. yep i did. it just made me think oh my goodness. this was a sweet glimpse of how we used to get to spend time with each other all the time. bittersweet. tastes so good, but there are few happy thoughts concerning the miles between us at this point. and that was just one near and dear friend. whats that say for scarlett and my momma and daddy???? this is why i am a little worried.and here is a little more explaination on why there is reason to worry about the topic.
you see, i LoVE NYC. i just wish the distance between nyc and dallas could be like the distance between dallas and denton. the absolute PERFECT distance. but its not. it is a very complicated 2500 miles from point a to b. so i love living here and i am not coming home for good yet and i dont really want to, but i do love some people in dallas that make the place rather hard to resist. so i am just wondering how i will cope with the deep love of two places and many people in each place whom i love. it is a challenging topic to face. so in this sense i am worried about coming home and loving it and wanting to never return to nyc. wouldnt you be a little concerned if you had rent and roommates to answer to.
well to end on a happy note I AM SO EXCITED TO COME HOME AND SEE EVERYONE!!! i hope scarlett has been studying her pictures and practicing her "S's" fun fun. call me or email me if you are reading this and want to see my face!
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2 comments:
oh sally, i feel your pain my friend! i am in love with denton and i am in love with san pedro, but you can't have both at once! i came home a few days ago and it's bittersweet. sure, i love home, but now i miss Denton. i guess i've learned on my trips back and forth in the last year and a half to enjoy the time and the people whenever i am at that given time. make sure both know you love them and enjoy the time you DO have. it comes with very weird feelings though, i do agree. i'm sad i'll miss you in TX :(. enjoy your family and friends for the holidays. merry christmas sally. i love you.
Love that I'm going to get to read your thoughts on a more regular basis....
Thanks for showing me my Google Reader...
See you soon....
<3, Deb
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